The Gong Show is Coming Back

Hosted by Dave Attell on Comedy Central (aka where movies go to die) July 17.   No word if “Have You Got A Nickle” will make an appearance.  Also no word on when it’ll be immediately cancelled.


Physicists Create Tiny Universe

Physicists in the UK (aka broken tooth central) have created a teeny tiny universe that essentially repeatedly keeps expanding and contracting into itself, possibly mimicking what they believe happened during “the Big Bang”.  Shortly thereafter, those same physicists gave the big bang to their stripper wives in celebration.


Whos the Cutest Snake In The World With A Baby Kitten In Its Belly???

YOU ARE! Thats right!  You let him naturally digest for a week in your bewwy wewwy.   Hahahaha this picture is so morbid.


Homeless 007


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Favorite Website of the Day: Photoshop Disasters

Shes got MAN hands baby!


Passengers Behaving Badly: The Nasty Stuff Left Behind In The Seat Air Pocket

Melted chocolate, USED baby diapers, and other crap.  That blanket that guy’s wearing?  Been blown in.  Try to figure out which version of blown im talking about.


13 Things Your Car Mechanic Wont Tell You

Things not on the list: How not to get cheated, How To Get Tawny Kitaen to Dance On the Top of Your Car, How to Shoot a Gun At The Bad Guys While Doing a 360.  Die Hard baby!


Vanity Fair “It” Class of 1999: Where Are They Now

They’re so beautiful and perfect, and we all know nothing happens to beautiful people.  By the way, for those of you playing at home, which one doesn’t fit in with the others?  Ill give you a hint, she slept with Tom Cruise.


Wife: Alex Rodriguez fainted during first daughter’s birth

She proceeds to embarrass ARod even more by saying he cries after every time they’re intimate.


Guess Who Won the Latest Undeserving Award: Dina Lohan

The Hollywood World, reeling after discovering that Puff Daddy has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame after his roles in the movie…um…yes well anyway, Dina Lohan has been given the coveted Long Island”Mom of the Year Award” for her ability to, get this: “It’s a list of mothers from Long Island who have raised superstar children.”

Bravo.


Dcbin Presents Todays AW SH*T News Of the Day: Scarlett Johottie and Ryan Reyhottie Engaged

Oh like we had any chance. Also, did you hear her album? Man, i hope shes not singing at her wedding. OH SNAP. Sorry im just venting.


In Case You Didn’t Know, Its Legal for US Customs To Make A Copy of Your Laptop/Cell Phone

Based on a recent ruling, US Customs has the right, without having to give a reason, to search and make a physical COPY of your laptop/cell phone and retain that copy.  However it doesn’t state that you are actually required to give them the password to your computer.  This stemmed from a recent case where child pr0n was found on some dude’s laptop on a recent search and he could not be convicted.  Those guys are always ruining things!


So Much For GTA:4 Ruining the Take For Iron Man

It made like, 60 Billion Dollars.  Iron Man the sequel supposedly will be coming out in 2010.  SO LATE?!?!


Time’s 100 Most Influential People

 This is a very intricate process of selection which pretty much boils down to a handful of clowns in a room yelling names and some poor intern misspelling most of them on a whiteboard. Then another intern spell checks them and puts them in order of how many search results they have when Googled. Finally a sales algorithm is run by each name to see how many magazines it will potentially sell. Hence, Miley Cyrus is #1 and will probably be for the next 5 years…


New pics of Rihanna

NEW not NUDE.